Some Christians with sincere motives may have hesitations regarding the use of an introduction vehicle like SinglesOfFaith.Com.

[ Potential Concern 1. ] Some Christians fear that being active in the pursuit of God's relationships for us may be somehow "taking things into our own hands" ... "not truly trusting God" ... "not being men and women of faith." They wonder if God isn't supposed to somehow "drop that person into our lives" without our having to be active or involved in any way in the process. "After all," some would ask, "isn't God aware of our deepest desires and needs? Doesn't He know the best timing for us to meet him / her?" (They will often cite Matt 6:33, "Seek first God's Kingdom and all these things (food, drink and clothing) will be added unto you.")

Our answer ... absolutely. God knows (and has even pre-determined, some would say) who we are to meet, when we will meet them and how.

However, God's sovereignty is never to be used as a justification for human inactivity. "Sanctified passivity" has never been a behavioral standard for Christians to pursue. Jesus never pointed to folks and commanded them to "sit and wait" (unless it was mealtime for 5,000 or more.) He never told folks to "go limp" in the areas of life in which they sought God's will. Quite the contrary, Jesus commanded folks, "follow me !" He told them to be active in their pursuit of Him, His will and His Kingdom. "Pick up your pallet and walk !" A walk with Christ is just that ... a walk, and not a sit. Jesus' disciples followed Him. They didn't just sit around the campfire all day waiting for some kind of "magic" to mysteriously happen. They DID witness miracles, but they were not taught to sit around until one happened (except for extraordinarily rare instances.)

Let us consider some practical examples. If a friend lost their job, would we encourage them to sit still and wait for a supernatural appearance by their next employer? Of course not. We'd encourage them to send out resumes. Network actively. Aggressively read the newspaper opportunities pages. Consider hiring a search consultant. We'd (rightly) encourage them to be ACTIVE in the pursuit of God's will. Faithful activity is an act of obedience as we partner with God through this life, and it does not indicate a lack of trust or faith in God.

Groceries don't mysteriously appear on our shelves (though God has promised to care for our daily needs.) We must do the shopping. Gasoline doesn't mystically "show up" in our automobile gas tanks. We must search out and drive to gas stations to fill the tank. Houses don't just appear on the County Tax Assesor's rolls with our names on them. We must hire real estate agents, inspectors, termite eradicators, roofers, landscapers and a host of other folks to purchase and maintain our personal residences. We are to be active in the process of responsibly stewarding what God has for us in this life.

We believe this erroneous idea of "sanctified passivity" shows up in this relationships area (and usually this area alone) because of it's intertwinement with romance and fantasy. The knight on the white horse rides up, we're told as children. We open our eyes from prayer and there he/she sits, right next to us on the church pew.

That is not real life. Not God's intention. Man's wish-dream, perhaps. But not God's style.

In every area of life God is sovereign. And He has promised to lead us into His will (if we pursue hard after Him.) And every now and then He DOES perform "miraculous" introductions. But He has not proposed or encouraged us to live a model made of magic (like unbelievers' over-romanticizing of spectacular meetings/introductions.) The rudder on a ship only works when the ship is moving. Our call is to follow, not to sit.

Office-based and online introduction services, like employment agencies, automobile dealerships, grocery stores and churches, are VEHICLES used by God to bring people together with products, services, and other people. But He leads us to them, not vice versa.

We serve a God who is in control, but not one who is black-magic (or white-magic.) Nor a puppeteer.

[ Potential Concern 2. ] "Dating services are only for desperate people," right?

Although "desperate," needy, hurting, wounded and dysfunctional folk may, indeed, be attracted to introduction services, "singles groups," grocery stores, freeways and church sanctuaries, the fact that they are attracted ought not disqualify the use or validity of those service providers for those of us who are healthy.

The dilemma in most of our worlds today is this: Whereas UNbelievers have their bar scenes, singles dances and wild parties, we as Christians have virtually no vehicles whatsoever to meet other emotionally healthy single Christians (short of scouring the pews on Sunday, turning the Church into some kind of "dating scam," an unacceptable option for those of us who approach worship for the purpose of being in the presence of God rather than potential dates.)

(Further, church "singles groups," though valid ministries, generally (not always) attract less healthy folk.)

Might you encounter a "desperate" person on SinglesOfFaith.Com? It's certainly possible. That's why solid relationship skills are so important. Being able to recognize relationship "red flags," relationship-readiness in ourselves and potential partners, the imperative questions to get answers to before pursuing a relationship with another person, etc.

If you have discovered another way to meet healthy single Christians, bless you. Please tell the rest of us your secret(s). You do not need SinglesOfFaith.Com. But please do not rely on an old-fashioned cultural comment to prevent God from leading you into His vehicles for what He has for you.

May your day be as amazing in our Lord as HE has intended, as we follow Him into the future He has for us ...